ORLANDO, Fla. (MCT) — first things first: We go through Epcot security, where they paw through our bags to make sure we don’t spoil anyone’s day with bombs or pistols, then we juke around the enormous faceted sphere that symbolizes Progress, or something. Straight up toward the fountain, around to the right, and huzzah: free Coke. all you can drink. It’s the World of Coke attraction, with flavors from around the globe.
I pour a glass of Beverly, an Italian drink described by most people as a remarkably undrinkable abomination, and give it to my daughter. she refuses it. I drink it off and have another, daring all to marvel: See the man who willingly drinks Beverly.
It’s how we start our day at Epcot, a family tradition. How did I know it was there?
Because I’ve been to Walt Disney World and its four theme parks a few times in my day, and I know a thing or two.
So here you go, friends: insider tips they don’t want you to know. Seriously! If you clip it out and take it to Disney World, Goofy will walk over and rip it right out of your hands. well, no. The people who run the Mouse Nation want you to know little tips and tricks. some things, however, you need to figure out yourself, such as “How did it come to pass that I am paying $6 for a Rice Krispies bar?”
We will explain why. Eventually. first, some things to consider:
Where to stay?
Not everyone wants to stay at a Disney-owned resort. We call these people communists. but if you want to go “off-property,” as we insiders call it, the enormous Dolphin and Swan hotels are popular; they’re also designed by Michael Graves, who did that snappy line of brooms and toilet brushes for Target.
If you stay at a Disney resort, you’ll get a 175 percent increase in the amount of Disney-osity your child will experience. The resorts have little to do with the theme parks, so you don’t burn out after day one; rather, the Disney-osity comes from the set design and experience management. Choose from a Caribbean theme around a vast fake lake, or a Mexican theme around a vast fake lake, or a 19th-century upstate new York theme around a vast fake lake, and so on.
Prices vary, but they all have one thing in common: free transportation to the parks and water attractions. Buses run constantly until the park closes. By the way, your room’s keycard serves as your currency while you’re in the Mouse nation. everything gets charged to the card, which makes it seem as if you’re not spending money at all. The downside is a mortifying bill at the end of it, but at least you’ll see where everything went.